Lent day 15

good evening...

i sinned at lunch today...

please don't tell nancy...

i was sitting at a chinese restaurant in south tampa eating sesame chicken for lunch...

not good...

[but it sure tasted great...]

i was sitting there reflecting on a richard rohr quote about "conversion"...

i wrote in my journal: "what is conversion really???"

wonder if it has anything to do with overcoming gluttony -- ha! ha!

in the middle of it all, god redeemed my sinfulness...

a homeless guy walked in and started begging the asian hostess for a cup of rice...

"i am so hungry -- PLEASE!!!"

she brought him a little container of rice...

he was relieved...

i heard god say to do something more...

so i walked up and asked if he would like some sesame chicken...

he broke out in a smile...

a $6 investment...

jimmy sat down at the table with me while they were preparing his food...

as we talked, the lady at the table next to us had her leftovers packaged and gave them to him...

he was from stone mountain GA...

he had lost his job and was living on the street in south tampa...

he was struggling with life -- and with god...

not really "all there..."

pretty angry...

"how can you say that god really cares and watches out for us???"

"i try to trust god, but i just got beat up by two guys on nebraska..."

"where was god then?"

i shared my thought that god is always around...

in the good and in the not so good...

sometimes bad stuff just happens...

before it was all over, jimmy had a bag of food...

he will eat for a whole day [at least]...

i suggested that maybe his blessing might have come from god...

he smiled...

we hugged and he left...

i blessed him...

the richard rohr quote:

"conversion, the movement toward the Lord, is a process of disenchantment with the ego, recognizing how truly afraid and poor it is.

the only way people can ever be freed from their fears is to be freed from themselves...

there is almost a complete correlation between the amount of fear in our lives and the amount of attachment we have to ourselves...

the person who is beyond fear has given up the need to control or possess...

that one says, i am who i am in god's eyes -- nothing more, nothing less...

i don't need to impress you because i am who i am, and not who you think i am -- or who i think i am...

in christ, you do not need the false self...

you have faced the enemy once and for all and, guess what?

it's YOU!"

what is conversion???

think i will reflect on that in the morning when my brain is fresh again...

think i am done thinking for the night...

blessings!

guy

i wonder if conversion has anything to do with feeding the hungry?

maybe that is what jesus would do...

guy