holy saturday 2009

greetings!

it is almost sunrise on easter sunday...

i loved nouwen's reflection for today...

"if the God who revealed life to us, and whose only desire is to bring us to life, loved us so much that he wanted to experience with us the total absurdity of death, then -- yes, then there must be hope; then there must be something more than death; then there must be a promise that is not fulfilled in our short existence in this world; then leaving behind the ones you love, the flowers and the trees, the mountains and the oceans, the beauty of art and music, and all the exuberant gifts of life cannot be just the destruction and cruel end of all things; then indeed we have to wait for the third day..."

tonight, i experienced the grace of God in ybor at the colombia restaurant...

at this stage in my life, there are few things better than good food and a great time with a soul friend...

donald and i shared a meal together and more importantly -- the grace of God...

as we talked, i felt life in my spirit -- the stirrings of easter sunday...

when we touch a deep and resonant chord within each other, the result is always LIFE!

i did not wear a watch to supper this evening because i was in no hurry -- what a blessing...

an entire evening -- devoted to a friend and the sharing of the grace of God...

what peace...

what serenity...

a taste of heaven on earth...

[except i ate too much...]

thank God for soul friends and the sacrament of table fellowship...

[and a friend who will let me blast lynyrd skynyrd on the stereo]...

easter is coming -- it is almost here...

happy easter!

i will be thinking of you on my way to ft pierce in the morning...

please pray for me...

shalom!

guy

what a blessing it was to drop some food by to mr williams -- he was so happy -- it is a great feeling to be remembered...

good friday 2009

greetings!

i share nouwen's prayer...

"o dear Lord, what can i say to you?
is there any word that could come from my mouth,
any thought?
any sentence?
you died for me, you gave your life for my sins,
you not only became man for me
but also suffered the most cruel death for me.
is there any response?
i wish that i could find a fitting response...
but in contemplating your holy passion and death
i can only confess humbly to you
that the immensity of your divine love
makes any response seem totally inadequate.
let me just stand and look at you.
your body is broken, your head wounded,
your hands and feet are split open by nails,
your side is pierced.
your dead body now rests in the arms of your mother.
it is all over now.
IT IS FINISHED!
it is fulfilled.
it is accomplished.
sweet Lord, gracious Lord,
generous Lord, forgiving Lord,
i adore you,
i praise you,
i thank you.
you have made all things new
through your passion and death.
your cross has been planted in this world
as THE new sign of hope.

let me always live under your cross, o Lord,
aand proclaim the hope of your cross unceasingly.

amen...

shalom...

guy

there is HOPE!

holy thursday 2009

greetings!

a long day...

please pray for my mom -- she is back in the hospital...

nouwen spoke to me this morning while i was eating grits at the waffle house: "your eyes, o Lord, see in one glance the inexhaustible love of God and the seemingly endless agony of all people who have lost faith in that love and are like sheep without a shepherd...your eyes are so severe yet so loving, so unmasking yet so protecting, so penetrating yet so carressing, so profound yet so intimate, so distant yet inviting...i gradually realize that i want to be seen by you, to dwell under your caring gaze, and to grow strong and gentle in your sight. Lord, let me see what you see -- the love of God and the suffering of people so that my eyes may become more and more like yours, eyes that can heal wounded hearts..."

what a gift of language...

shalom...

guy

may we all sense the passion of the Christ on good friday...

wednesday of holy week 2009

greetings!

i saw three reminders of the resurrection today...

the first involved the passion of a family who lost betty [their beloved] today...

as we all sat around and talked about betty's death and remembered her life, we all came to the conclusion that there could not be a better season of the year to die...

when i die, i hope i die during holy week...

betty passed through the pain to gain the joy...

she went through the darkness to emerge into the light...

she endured the suffering to experience the glory...

she left behind what she could not keep to be given freely what she can never lose...

her good friday is already past -- her easter morn has brightly dawned...

what a seat she will have for easter sunrise service...

the second involved a frozen moment in time on the farm in plant city at sunset tonight...

my dad is sitting in his chair, i am on a plastic bucket...

a cool breeze is blowing [probably the last one of the spring]...

we are talking heart-to-heart and looking out over "our" garden...

just a week ago it was a dirt plot -- at least that's all i could see...

i was pretty sure that all our work had been in vain [what if the plants grew down into the ground instead of up]???

my gardening glass was mostly "empty"...

but in the dimming light of the early evening, tonight there are green sprouts breaking through the soil EVERYWHERE...

as ricky my native american friend says -- the land is amazing -- it is a miracle every year -- we plant and the fruit comes up and it feeds us -- and if we love the land and care for it -- it keeps providing year-after-year-after-year-after-year...

it is a miracle!

dead seeds giving birth to living plants...

buried in the ground but now exploding forth in life...

guess Jesus was right: "unless a seed fall to the ground and die it cannot bring forth the fruit of life..."

the surrendered death of friday yields the victorious life of sunday dawn...

a crucified lamb catalizes a conquering lord...

finally, i fed the cows for daddy before i left to come back to my life in the city...

my eyes focused in on one cow -- a beautiful rusty-colored mama who was about to be a mama once again...

the calf was "coming down" -- starting to descend -- it won't be long...

her bag is already filling with nourishing milk for her baby...

when the "time of her delivery has fully come" -- there will be pain, agony and passion...

and all the mothers say AMEN...

but then, a baby...

and, in just a few moments, everything was worth it...

first the pain -- then the joy...

the ugly scene gives way to the beauty...

the suffering and then the glory...

first the INCARNATION and PASSION, then the RESURRECTION...

the beautiful baby, the battered lamb, the ultimate lord...

holy week found me today...

in a patient's living room...

in our garden...

at the feed trough...

and i am so grateful...

my prayer is that holy week finds you as well...

shalom...

guy

as i worked on the farm today, my 50 year old body was screaming in pain -- i am looking forward to my new Jesus-body more than ever -- how about you???

tuesday of holy week 2009

greetings...

our journey is so exciting as holy week unfolds before us...

immediately after Jesus washes his disciples' feet [at the beginning of john 13], we read...

"Jesus was troubled in spirit, and declared, 'very truly, i tell you, one of you will betray me...'" [john 13.21]

a better translation in the original greek would be: "one of you will hand me over..."

the word means "to give over, to hand over, to give into the hands of..."

i love nouwen's insight: "this moment when Jesus is handed over to those who do with him as they please is a turning point in Jesus' ministry. it is a turning point from action to passion. after years of teaching, preaching, healing, and moving to wherever he wanted to go, Jesus is handed over to the caprices of his enemies. things are now no longer done BY him, but TO him. he is flagellated, crowned with thorns, spat at, laughed at, stripped, and nailed naked to a cross. he is a passive victim, subject to other people's actions. from the moment Jesus is handed over, his passion begins, and through his passion he fulfills his vocation...it is good news to know that Jesus is handed over to passion, and through his passion accomplishes his divine task on earth. it is good news for a world passionately searching for wholeness...i, too, have to let myself be 'handed over' and thus [embrace my passion to] fulfill my vocation..."

will we sign up to embrace our passion and hence fulfill our calling?

will we relinquish the control that enables us to call the shots?

will we become a bondslave of Jesus and allow the Holy Spirit to lead us AS HE WILLS?

what about our "passion"...

first thing this morning, i went by to visit mr williams...

his broken and declining body still imprisoned in his 8 x 10 hovel...

his body is showing the wear of the disease process...

as we sat huddled on his single bed, the Spirit motivated a question...

next i went to see ricky, my native american friend -- he had just been admitted to the hospice house...

when i first walked in, i was sure he had died -- he looked like an emaciated corpse...

i touched his arm and he stirred and we talked -- though at times he made almost no sense...

then the Spirit motivated a question...

later in the day, i was off to tampa general hospital...

mr coard was grimacing in pain as i walked into his room...

his body has literally shrivelled up -- only a faint shadow of what it used to be...

he tried to talk, but his slurs were almost undiscernable...

the Spirit motivated a question...

i finished my day in myra's room at TGH...

all her hair is gone, but she has a stylish and colorful 'do rag on her bald head...

she tries to smile, but the enemy, cancer, twists her beautiful brown face in an uneasy and haunting grimace...

we hold hands and i hear the Spirit's question again...

i didn't plan the question...

not sure i'm that bright!

but the Spirit did -- the same question with each patient -- four times...

reminding each that it was holy week, i asked: "what does Jesus' resurrection mean to you today?"

there was some consensus about three things...

[1] there was the agony and suffering of good friday before the glory and joy of resurrection sunday...

so maybe there is "something" good on the other side of their passion...

[2] easter means hope -- death is never the final word for a child of God -- LIFE ALWAYS IS -- there is heaven...

a forever place of serenity after the suffering...

two great insights, but these two paled in comparison to the final one...

[3] Jesus resurrection means a BRAND NEW BODY -- not a COPD body, not a CANCER body, not a PAINFUL body, not a BROKEN body, not an INCONTINENT body, not a BED-BOUND body, not a YELLOWISH body, not a MISHAPEN body -- you get the idea...

these four broken children of ABBA reminded me of easter's greatest joy -- we receive a brand new "spiritual" body just like Jesus -- one that will never decay, decline or die...

more than just heaven -- heaven with a glorious new body!

THANK YOU Holy Spirit for an illustrated sermon in remarkable power through abject weakness!

i encountered your revelation as i walked out my passion today...

shalom...

guy

reflect on the promise of YOUR new body tomorrow...

monday of holy week

greetings!

happy holy week...

do you remember caiaphas?

john [18.13] reminds us that he was the jewish high priest when Jesus was arrested...

in fact, after Jesus was betrayed by judas' kiss, he had to appear before caiaphas in his role as the high priest for this year...

caiaphas was a strategic player in the mock trial of Jesus -- he was a driving force behind the mob-inspired crucifixion of the Messiah...

he set the tone for Jesus' condemnation...

john says [in 18.14]: "now caiaphas was the one who had advised the jews that it was expedient for one man to die on behalf of the people..."

Jesus was dangerous -- he was far too popular -- he was "winning over the whole world!"

something had to be done -- there were positions of power to protect...

there was a treasured system to maintain...

caiaphas was the mouthpiece for a host of other religious leaders who were scared of losing their power, their place and their prestige...

better for one to die than for the whole system to topple to the palestinian soil...

Jesus would have to die!

ever wonder how caiaphas came to this pitiable point?

what was his story?

brennan manning in "reflections for ragamuffins" [march 12] offers the following commentary...

"a terrible thing has happened to caiaphas. religion has left the realm of respect for person, immediate concern for the individual, for communion. for caiaphas, sacredness has become institutions, structures, abstractions. caiaphas is dedicated to the 'people'. therefore, individual, flesh-and-blood men, real people, are expendable. caiaphas is dedicated to the 'nation'. but the nation does not bleed like Jesus. caiaphas is dedicated to the 'temple', a mere building, impersonal brick and mortar. caiaphas becomes impersonal himself, no longer a warm human being but a robot, as fixed and rigid as his own unchanging world...the choice usually presented to christians is NOT between Jesus and barabbas. no one wants to appear an obvious murderer. the choice we have to be careful about is between JESUS and CAIAPHAS. and caiaphas can fool us. he is a very 'religious' man..."

beware the cultic koolaid of religion gone toxic...

it is deadly...

and, it is so easy to be deceived...

we have a choice to make -- for Jesus, not for caiaphas...

let's not be fooled!

shalom...

guy

may your holy week be filled with passion for the Christ!

day 40, lent 2009, palm sunday

greetings!

how do you like my nifty little bookshelves?

hit the little "next" button at the bottom and you can see some more...

NO, i am not lying about those books -- i either have read or are reading them...

and YES, they are AWESOME!

and, reading is much safer for us old codgers than mountain biking, etc.

just want you to know that i set up the bookshelves all by myself [with a little help from leah] -- there is techie hope for me yet!

i have so much in me for tonight [after my drive over to tampa bay to meditate at the sunset on Jesus' triumphal entry into jerusalem] that i literally don't know where to start [and its coming up on midnight]...

so here goes...

i was visiting with mr garcia this week...

it was early in the morning and he was just getting up...

he is a COPD patient [the new fancy term for emphysema -- simply put, he can hardly breathe now -- he gets short of breath while we are simply talking]...

by the way, he does a very convincing commercial for DO NOT SMOKE PERIOD!

during our visit, he lost his breath and could not breathe...

they call it an exacerbation [a respiratory crisis]...

i was getting edgy, but...

mr garcia never missed a beat -- he knew just what to do...

we prepared his nebulizer treatment and he was soon breathing in the medicated mist...

we could not talk during his treatment so i was scanning his single room in a family member's house...

he had a crucifix hanging on his wall in plain sight...

i was transfixed...

it was a different cross...

not a protestant cross, but a catholic cross...

two crosses -- one faith...

it is a cross like the one on my new rosary [yes, i am still OK with God -- probably better than i have ever been]...

the rosary gives me a feeling of connection to the ancient...

and, i am remembering some foundational elements of my faith as i pray through the beads...

the cross has Jesus on it...

still hanging there!

mr garcia's crucifix has Jesus on it...

all my protestant crosses do NOT have Jesus on them...

mr garcia startles me back to reality when he shares his nebulizer mist with his BIG cat -- the cat doesn't like the noise or the mist so it begins to "box" and "paw" at the mist...

mr garcia is delighted -- it is funny...

when the cat settles back down, i ask mr garcia about his crucifix...

are you catholic? why is Jesus on your cross? why are there two crosses? how many more questions should i ask before i let you answer?

he smiles and says -- i was born a catholic -- now i am a baptist -- i am just covering all my bases -- i am dying you know...

he laughs...

he wants to talk about other stuff...

so we do, but i am still hung up...

two crosses?

i love the protestant reminder that Jesus has been resurrected and he is NOT on the cross anymore -- good reformation [and biblical] theology...

BUT, i like the catholic reminder that Jesus suffered on a real cross and died there so that we might live...

that is good experiential [and biblical] theology!

at least in my world, i need to be reminded of the suffering...

it is very easy for me to zoom past the passion of Jesus to his glorious resurrection [and it is quite typical of my expediency to gladly forego suffering in order to claim all the blessings that are surely coming my way]...

i want my life [and my crosses] to be free of this grim reminder of suffering...

but, Jesus still on the cross screams LOVE to me -- i remember his broken body and his spilled blood...

my heart is stirred and strangely warmed...

love of another kind...

i was listening to michael card sing of Jesus' irrational love for us on the way back from the bay: "he could not love us more and he refuses to love us any less!"

holy week is a journey of extravagant love -- being stopped in our tracks by what matters most -- Jesus' INCARNATION, DEATH and RESURRECTION are the consummate definition and in-your-face expression of authentic love!

keep thinking this week about...

two crosses...

i shared this because i wanted a simple start to our holy week together...

shalom...

guy

let's focus our readings of the events of holy week around luke's gospel and john's gospel -- OK????

day 39, lent 2009

can you believe it is day 39?

tomorrow is palm sunday...

there have been moments in the last 39 days when "God has shown up..."

we have been surprised by the joy of his presence...

we have heard his voice...

he has revealed wisdom from beyond...

what an awesome privilege to be in a moment when and where God "breaks through..."

i know it happens and yet i am still amazed at his gracious intervention...

i also know that these "kairos moments" cannot be manufactured, controlled or copyrighted...

we are never the catalyst -- God always is...

God remains ultimately free...

God is sovereign...

he is God and we are not...

nouwen says: "there is a great and subtle temptation to suggest to myself or others where God is working and where not, when he is present and when not, but nobody, no christian, no priest, no monk, has any 'special' knowledge about God. God cannot be limited by any human concept or prediction. he is greater than our mind and heart and perfectly free to reveal himself where and when he wants...we can close our eyes as tightly as we can and clasp our hands as firmly as possible, but God speaks only when he wants to speak. when we realize this our pressing, pushing, and pulling become quite amusing. sometimes we act like a child that closes his eyes and thinks that he can make the world go away...after having done everything TO MAKE SOME SPACE for God, it is still God who comes on his own initiative. but we have a promise upon which to base our hope. the promise of his love..."

so what is our part?

maybe it is "to make some space..."

and to trust in his love...

and to desire...

and to wait...

maybe it is "to be still and know that he is God..."

hope i am the first to wish you a wonder-filled palm sunday...

shalom...

guy

looking forward to holy week with you...

day 38, lent 2009

greetings!

sunday is palm sunday...

next week is holy week...

culminating with...

maunday thursday...

good friday...

resurrection sunday...

today's thought is from nouwen in SHOW ME THE WAY: "God has become human -- that is, God-with-us -- in order to show us that the anxious concern for recognition and the violence among us spring from a lack of faith in the love of God. if we had a firm faith in God's unconditional love for us, it would no longer be necessary to be always on the lookout for ways of being admired by people, and we would need, even less, to obtain from people by force what God desires to give us so abundantly..."

fr basil pennington has identified three basic issues which comprise the "false self" -- living our lives based on three basic false premises that our value is based on what we have, what we do and what other people think of us...

but the "true self" finds its authentic identity as the beloved child of the Father...

our lives are best fulfilled by nurturing the true self, not being driven by the false self!

YOU are the beloved of the Father...

rest in his love this weekend...

shalom...

guy

day 37, lent 2009

greetings!

continuing from last night...

life and ministry is about Jesus' INCARNATION, DEATH and RESURRECTION...

i have reflected and written quite a bit on the INCARNATION as a missional model...

what about Jesus' DEATH?

what does this mean for my life and my mission as a Christ follower?

i want to list three things before hitting the sack tonight...

first of all, the death of Jesus makes a clear statement about embracing SUFFERING [not safety and ease] as a way of both life and ministry...

contrary to the view of the western church, the goal of our faith adventure is not to "confess" our way out of suffering or to escape difficulties of any and all kinds...

the cross makes an unmistakable statement about the efficacy of suffering...

there is mysterious value in the agony we encounter for a higher cause...

only through dying can one truly live...

secondly, the death of Jesus is a call to OBEDIENCE [not egoism and self-will]...

Jesus had to pass through gethsemane ["the place of crushing"] during holy week on his way to golgotha...

remember the lesson of Jesus' personal crushing in the place of the vats where grapes were mashed into grape juice for fermentation?

it came in Jesus' powerful prayer of submission to his Father: "not MY will, but YOUR will be done!"

there is a mysterious value in coming to the point of personal surrender...

only through obedience can love be fully manifested...

thirdly, the death of Jesus is a call to SERVICE [not privilege and position]...

nouwen says: "Jesus became like one of us so that we might become like him. he did not cling to his equality with God, but emptied himself and became as we are so that we might become like him and thus share in his divine life..."

there is a mysterious value in pouring ourselves out in loving service to those who can do absolutely nothing to return the favor...

not the way of the upwardly mobile "movers and shakers" of this world, but the preferred path of downward mobility for the sons and daughters of the burgeoning kingdom that will rule in the end forever and ever...

only through intentional service can this world be transformed...

"small things done with great love will change the world!" [mother teresa]

what do you think?

how does the DEATH of Jesus impact your life and mission???

i can "feel" that there is MUCH more -- death is about LIFE, SALVATION, FRESH STARTS, NEW BEGINNINGS, REMEMBERING, HOPE, TRUST, CHOICE, etc.

shalom!

guy

T.G.I.F.

day 36, lent 2009

greetings...

i had a small, but very meaningful, epiphany tonight...

one that will keep me busy reflecting for quite awhile...

one that might even transform my personal view of mission...

it all happened so innocently -- such a surprise...

i was reading nouwen's SHOW ME THE WAY for the wednesday of passion week -- so much good stuff from henri -- i was having a hard time choosing the "nugget" i was going to share with you tonight...

but then, this paragraph JUMPED OUT at me: "life in the Spirit of Jesus is therefore a life in which Jesus' coming into the world -- his incarnation, his death, and resurrection -- is lived out by those who have entered into the same obedient relationship to the Father which marked Jesus' own life. having become sons and daughters as Jesus was Son, our lives become a continuation of Jesus' mission..."

for years, i have been asking the question: "what is my personal model for mission -- my personal understanding of pastoral care???"

my answer, of late, has centered around the INCARNATION...

i have been meditating deeply on the significance of the incarnation for missional ministry -- good stuff!

the INCARNATION...

a very good answer -- my reflections have been deeply enriching -- BUT it has seemed incomplete -- almost like "something" was incomplete...

so, maybe i should extend my personal thoughts to include Jesus' DEATH and RESURRECTION...

i have some thoughts on the meaning of the INCARNATION...

but, what does it mean for me to live and minister in the power of Jesus' DEATH?

and, what does it mean for me to live and minister in the power of Jesus' RESURRECTION?

maybe a more complete theology of mission demands grappling with all three...

THANKS HENRI!

better yet, THANKS HOLY SPIRIT...

more reflections on this to follow...

shalom...

guy

sweet dreams...